by Emma Allbright ||
I think that I am starting to realize I have been going about writing the wrong way for a long time now. I have always wondered about what separates great writers from the rest of us—what it really takes to become successful, published, respected. What does it take to become a real writer? When can I finally start introducing myself—because almost all introductions involve one’s career—as a writer? How many publications do I need to garner before it is acceptable to add that tagline to my instagram bio?
I think a lot of emerging writers, such as myself, fall prey to this mindset. These are our hopes and dreams, the passions that fuel us from day to day. Writing encompasses so much of who we feel we are, but it can be hard to imagine ourselves ever living up to those ideals we have set up for ourselves. I know when I started studying creative writing here at the University of Houston, I felt myself growing as a writer—but I also felt my standards for myself and the kind of work I wanted to accomplish grow even more, so that my goals felt even farther out of my reach. I ended up getting so caught up in the how that I started to forget the why.
Well now I am deciding to say screw it. Screw that mindset. Screw the voice in your head telling you that you are not good enough. Pardon my french, but I am here to say screw it—the only thing separating you from being a “real” writer is the willingness to try. And maybe some patience and a few good years of life experience.
Yes, a healthy dose of reality is essential. Realistic goals can bring you step by step closer to the things you ultimately want to accomplish. Perfectionism can end up being a block rather than a driving force. It can be absolutely paralyzing. You can only give yourself the space to grow when you allow yourself to try and to fail. With each new attempt, you will come closer to the writer that you want to be.
We have all done it—read a great book, essay, poem, or short story and thought to ourselves ‘How did they come up with that? There’s no way I’ll ever write something that good’. And maybe this isn’t universal. Maybe this is just me and my own toxic perfectionism, but I think there are other people like me struggling with their limitations. And for all of those people, I want to say sincerely that the voice in your head is lying to you. I promise that your ideas, your experiences, your late night revelations—they are all interesting! And if you start giving yourself the permission to believe that, you will open the door to the “real” writer within you.
The difference between you and a published writer is they had the gall to write their thoughts down and submit them—and to go about it again after being rejected. Start to give yourself that same permission. Start to treat your own ideas and experiences as valuable material. Don’t just let your thoughts pass by—explore them, question them, look for connections. Write them down! This is how you get in touch with your inner voice and learn what it is you are trying to say to the world. I noticed that I really started to grow as a writer once I stopped writing what I thought other people wanted to hear. I stopped writing for the purpose of seeking respect or redemption from others, and started writing because I found I had something to say—and because I started believing what I had to say was worth hearing.
Writers are just ordinary people, and I mean that in the best possible way. Because ordinary is okay! Behind every ordinary person is a complex human being with a rich inner map of experiences and stories to tell. There is no one way to qualify success, it looks different for everyone and so the path to reaching it will look different as well.
Your journey as a writer will always be a work in progress. There is no magic finish line, no final evolution. You will come across moments of success and validation, but as a true writer, you will always aspire to new transformations. My tips for you are to read more, explore more, and try new things. Try out meditation and journaling to get in touch with your inner voice. Experiment with new mediums of expression like art or dance. Do things that spark your curiosity and raise questions about this life we are all living!
